| Things to Live For |
Chapter 8 |
Page 4 |
Some people seem to have a genius for making others miserable. They are continually touching sensitive hearts so as to cause pain. They are always saying things which sting and irritate. If you have any bodily defect, they never see you without in some rude way of making you conscious of it. If any relative or friend of yours has done some dishonorable thing, they seem to take a cruel delight in constantly referring to it when speaking with you. They lack all delicacy of feeling, having no eye for the things in other which demand gentleness of treatment.
Thoughtfulness is the reverse of all this. It simply does not do the things which thoughtlessness does. It avoids the painful subject. It never alludes to a man’s clubfoot or humpback, nor ever casts an eye at the defect, no does anything to direct attention to it or to make the man conscious of it. It respects your sorrow, and refrains from rudely touching your wound. It has the utmost kindliness of feeling and expression. Some one defines a gentleman as one who never gives pain to another. This is the true definition of thoughtfulness.
Then, there is also an active side. No grace is altogether negative. Thoughtfulness does not merely keep one from doing thoughtless things’; it also leads to continued acts of kindness and good will. It watches ever for opportunities to give pleasure and happiness. It does not wait to be asked for sympathy or help, but has eyes of its own, and sees every need, and supplies it unsolicited. When a friend is in sorrow, the thoughtful man is ready with his proffer of comfort. He does not come next day, when the need is past, but is prompt with his kindness when kindness means something.
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